Stephen White - Star #1 album

Star #1 is my first LP album with 8 songs and an interlude.

After several mistakes as an independent artist,

I decided to create an album with just one guitar

and a USB microphone from Guitar Hero.

My great friend Hans worked his magic

mixing and mastering the album.

Finishing it in just a few days.

Behind Star #1

In January 2021, I was evicted from my apartment.

My father and I had many financial problems, so the only place I could go was to my mother's house.

I had no idea what I was going to do, I was already over 20 years old and my music career had not taken off as I wished. During that time, I worked in many jobs that were not related to music, not even slightly.

So when 2022 started, I said to myself: 'I need to get back to making noise, making music. I made a music video with a song from the 'Novel Spark' album that I feel was the one I disliked the least after the mixing and mastering of the album that I didn't like. I called a great great friend who now seems to me, is breaking into the world of influencers.

Her name is Liza Baez, that's right, she appeared in my first music video. And we launched it on VEVO through YouTube, but more about that, in the story of Novel Spark...

Going back to the album. As the project didn't work out entirely, I knew I had to go out and play and I needed simple and catchy songs to look for a band to play my songs live.

I took my pink/white Squier Telecaster guitar and a USB microphone that I think was from Guitar Hero, and wrote Star #1 in two days.

STAR

"I'm just a young star, looking for a spot to shine"

Opening with the song STAR. I couldn't stop thinking about the premise of the album, the main reason why I started to create this project. It was quite obvious, I am a star, a great talent that no one knows yet... or at least that's what I believed at the beginning.

When you create your own goals and desires, sometimes you start from a point where you have talent and are born for what you do.

If you're like me, you probably felt like the best of all, a unique piece in your category. You think you are the best and that your destiny is to be what you so desire.

But then after so many years of effort, dedication, and stubbornness. I realized that I wasn't the best. Sure, I am a musical artist and I love what I do, but that doesn't mean I had to stand out among others. I longed to be like Michael Jackson, Freddie Mercury, Paul McCartney. I didn't just want to be successful but a legend. That's why it was so hard for me to let go of that dream.

In the end, I understood that my story is different, my circumstance is different. And if fate exists, well, I guess it must have something personal for me.

The struggle between ego and complacency was what created this song.

MARY

"How far would you go, to follow and see my dreams, Mary?"

In 2020, I started a somewhat complicated romantic relationship.

There were highs and lows, the turning point of the relationship was when I finally decided to stay with her, but for some reason, we didn't share the same goals. We were different.

I wanted to be the emotional and physical support for her goals and achievements, just as she was for me. But she kept saying: 'I'll go wherever you go.'

As nice as that sounded, I felt selfish thinking I would take her everywhere with me regardless of her interests and desires. As if she were a toy for me.

We gradually drifted apart, until I decided to let her go. For a long time, I believed that was the main reason why I stopped being her boyfriend. Is it true? Were we really that different? Or maybe, once again, I was afraid of commitment and clinging to a stable relationship,

and therefore, did I decide to walk away again?

LET ME GO

"I chose my side, but you don't know where you wanna be"

I couldn't stop thinking that I was her emotional stability, and that if I was no longer in her life, maybe she would do something crazy.

And if she did, would it be my fault? Would I be guilty? Would a human life be in my hands? Or maybe I was just delirious.

Indirectly, I had to let her know that I had moved on

And that she had to do the same, no matter how much it hurt.

Sometimes I remembered how well we spent time together, and the incredible moments we created together. But I had to end the relationship, I no longer felt comfortable.

But maybe, just maybe, did I end it with her because I believed she was not the right one? That question has been haunting me for years, but more on that later...

I'M SORRY

"I've never meant to hurt you in any way, I always tried to sing you a lullaby"

Perhaps one of the characteristics that most define me as a person is that I get attached very easily to those with whom I establish a relationship. Whether it's a friendship, a family member, a romantic relationship, or camaraderie, I am overly affectionate with everyone.

I always tried to find a way to talk to her and to find out if she was doing well and had moved on.

It's not that I was her world, or that I'm labeling myself as a heartbreaker. But it definitely made me think that the only relationship I didn't end was my first relationship that I had since I was 11 years old.

Part of me tried to explain why I ended the relationship.

To this day, I still believe that it wasn't enough, and that no one will ever understand why I always walk away... not even I know, not yet.

TEMPESTAD

"Y pensar que para alcanzar tu lealtad ella debe entrar...por mi ventana"

Ah, Tempestad!

The first and probably the last song I write in Spanish.

I remember having a conversation with DJ, an old friend who kept telling me: -'Do you know why your songs don't hit? Do you know why you're still not recognized?'

-'Why?' I would respond. His answer was always the same:

-'Because you only make music in English.'

Wherever that conversation went, we always came back to the same 'why'.

So, one day, I decided to make his dream come true. I wrote 'Tempestad' for her.

I based it a lot on her personality and the way she acted with me. So rebellious, dark, a dog lover, affectionate, and loyal.

Her mood swings were so abrupt that I could only think of the word 'Tempestad'."

HOPELESS

"just I'm okay without you, I should thank the way you acted too".

Maybe you think here comes another part of the story about that girl, but no.

I remember perfectly after having written that alternative rock song in Spanish, with so much power and energy, many memories came to my mind.

Once again 'she' made herself present in my thoughts.

The one who broke my heart and trampled it like 'dry poop on the street that no one pays attention to'. Why did I have to think about her again? I thought it was all over. All over? I never expressed myself openly, I never let her know that I wasn't interested in what she had said about that time we were together.

Sure, she said that nothing was real, that we should never have been together, that she was too confused and vulnerable. But it seems she had that well preserved. I never spoke of it and clearly had not put an end to it.

Every word I wrote, it was as if she was regretting it in front of me.

As if I now had the control to play with her emotions, to trample her heart as she did with mine. But that opportunity will never happen, and even if I had the chance to confess to her how I felt, I would not tell her in any way..

I'M OKAY

"I'm okay, I've moved on far away, Oh I'll be okay even though you're not there".

Would it be valid to use the same words for more than one person?

Would it be prudent to make my emotional phrases fit into more than one relationship?

After a few months of having ended my 2020-2021 relationship, she seemed happy, radically changed her personality (or maybe exaggerated it) and apparently already had another guy by her side, how wonderful, right?

After all, it was I who ended that relationship.

It was I who asked her to let me go. And then I thought about another relationship, a past one, and one before that one. And even how my first relationship ended... she chose to be with someone else instead of me.

I gathered all my bad breakups and told myself 'fuck it', 'I'm fine and I don't need them'.

Really? Was I really okay? Could it be that instead of being angry at them, I was actually angry at myself?

If one thing was certain, it's that 'the right one' hasn't appeared yet... or maybe never will.

Now you know the story behind Star #1.

Do you want to listen to the album with this context?

And as if that wasn't enough. I really wanted to create an audiovisual project.

So I decided to make a music video for each song.

Something fun, out of context, and attention-grabbing.

You can watch each and every one of them on my YouTube channel.